The child often asks for pens: reasons and the right approach

To take a newborn or a toddler up to three years of age in your arms means to respond to his natural needs, which are fundamental for psychophysical well-being. It is impossible to spoil the character of the child in this way, on the contrary, the parents become closer, there is more trust, and development is proceeding correctly.

Is it possible to spoil a child if you always carry it in your arms

This question is asked frequently, and the positive statement is passed down from one generation to the next. This belief is still deeply rooted in our culture with no objective or scientific basis. The practice of limiting physical contact between a child and a parent is a fairly strong prejudice, so let’s dwell on it in more detail.

Immediately after birth, the child seeks physical intimacy, it guarantees survival outside the mother’s body, which is noticeable among all the babies of the globe. How do little crumbs communicate to the new world that they are cold, hungry and even a little scared? That’s right, crying, whims and sometimes bad behavior. And most often, they just want to be close to their mother, because only she is able to protect and solve all problems, at least a child under three years of age thinks so.

It seems that children are ready to be in their arms all day and night and the impression of being spoiled by attention is really justified. But under what situation? When the parent is tired. And it’s good when there is a dad, grandma and grandpa. This makes it much easier to distribute forces to ensure a sense of security for the child.

No, the desire to constantly sit on the arms does not become a habit and does not harm the whole family at once, he is not interested in sitting on his hands all day long, in the end, curiosity and the natural desire to master the world around him wins, and if the baby cries all the time and does not move away from Mom, then it makes sense to think.

Why does a child constantly ask for pens

In addition to the healthy need, there are other factors. The reasons can be very different, mainly a lack of attention, fear, a feeling of abandonment. All of the above can be noticed when there is discord in the family, a change of residence, the birth of a second baby. Any event that is not the most understandable to the child becomes a stressful situation in which the child seeks protection and understanding, which is sometimes denied to him, believing that he demands a lot.

The child is always in her arms – the impact on independence

So, it can be said that picking up a child is just as important as feeding and caring for him, but there is an opinion, which again is not supported by science – this action violates autonomy. However, early separation between parent and child does not affect independence in any way. Where did the belief come from? An adult is considered good when he solves different situations on his own, the modern world is developing rapidly and now, this attitude is also assigned to children.

But we need to understand that a small child needs care based on his abilities. One-year-olds can wipe the dining table as best they can, but this does not mean that he is ready to refuse his request – I want to handle it. No study has shown that children who adapt early to the world at large become more successful adults.

How to explain that mom is tired

For such a case, there are children’s books with bright pictures, you can lie down next to the child so as not to take him in your arms or play together with cars on the rug in the children’s room. The most effective way – talking, simple conversation and hugs will help eliminate tears.

Leaving a six-month-old baby crying and not picking him up as an educational technique will certainly not help make him stronger and more independent. With this approach, there is no answer to a natural need. As a result, the emotional memory “fixes” the lack of contact and at the unconscious level such traits as distrust, self-doubt are acquired, later, they become the main obstacle to success in all areas of life.