The child does not want to go to kindergarten: reasons

The first and calm days of visiting kindergarten are an exception to the rule. Most children experience this stage through fear and tears.

The main reasons why a child does not want to go to kindergarten

The period of adaptation to kindergarten lasts from several weeks to several months. Experienced teachers advise to wait out this time and calmly respond to tears. Do not be surprised that after the first week in kindergarten, the baby suddenly began to throw tantrums. After spending the weekend at home, it is difficult for him to accept the fact that he must again part with his parents. It will be wrong if you go on about and leave the crumbs at home, this will not bring the end of adaptation closer, but will prolong it. Explain to the baby that mom and dad go to work, and he goes to kindergarten, where teachers will look after him. Agree on the approach to the child with your spouse to prevent disagreements.

Some preschool children adapt worse than their peers. An alarming sign is health problems when there are frequent headaches, abdominal pain, vomiting, or regression in development during a visit to the kindergarten. In addition, rashes may appear, which is often associated not with nervous tension, but with an allergy to a certain product. If treatment continues for more than a week, and symptoms persist, it is recommended to stop attending kindergarten, at least for a couple of weeks. When attending preschool is unavoidable, talk to a psychologist.

Perhaps the problem lies not only in parting. Too large a group of children, inadequate conditions or overly strict teachers – leads to the fact that the baby refuses to attend kindergarten. Child crying in kindergarten? After a few days in kindergarten, he loses interest in the new place and begins to miss his parents. Ask him what exactly is bothering you. If unpleasant things come up and are confirmed, consider changing your preschool.

The most famous reason why a child refuses to attend kindergarten is age. Children under three or four years old are not ready to communicate with their peers without parental supervision. Constant explanations are required – why you can’t push, take away toys and how to act in different situations. Shy children especially suffer in the kindergarten, who have enough communication on the playground. Usually, even modest crumbs are ready to attend preschool at the age of five. This is the age when the child knows how to behave in society and has all the necessary skills, provided that the baby is completely healthy.

Another factor is the rejection of certain situations. For example, a child does not understand why he should now play, sleep or go for a walk. In addition, he may lack communication skills with peers, which happens quite often. How to fight back a fighter from the group, how to react when a toy was taken away? Try to find out the real motive and solve the situation correctly.

The most difficult causes of children’s tears in the kindergarten:

  • The teacher does not pay enough attention.
  • The child spends little time with the family.
  • Excessive shyness.
  • Conflict with a peer.
  • Problems using the toilet.
  • Kindergarten is associated with unpleasant memories.

What happens if you do not respond to children’s tears

A third of parents do this, and some even act as “Hitler” – they pull by the hand, spank, shout, scold. Indeed, it seems that nothing terrible happens to such children. They quickly calm down and calmly play all day long, waiting for their mother, and only when she comes, they burst into tears again. The situation is repeated day after day, until the child finally loses faith that the parents will understand and allow him to stay around for a few more months. Educators tend to hide the truth, saying that everything is fine. In fact, no one will tell you that a child:

  • does not leave the window all day
  • refuses to eat
  • crying all day
  • doesn’t go potty
  • behaves aggressively when trying to calm the caregiver
  • trying to run away from kindergarten
  • he prefers to sit in the corner of the room and no forces can pull him out of there.

This will continue for the first two weeks, then the symptoms will dull, but not because the child is used to it, he is just tired of waiting for help from his parents and gets used to the idea that he was abandoned. Hence, such signs of ” adaptation ” as weight loss, aggressive behavior, poor sleep, wet bed after a night’s rest. What to do to avoid all this? Give the child to kindergarten after three years or when he strives for constant communication with children (does not want to leave the playground if the walk lasted more than three hours). Prepare for kindergarten from the age of two – follow the regime, temper, walk more with children of his age, discuss different situations.

Kindergarten is a completely new reality for the little one. Show care and patience. Answer, speak and listen. Encourage each achievement and support in difficult times.